Catalyst thoughts...

As a mentioned before, the theme of Catalyst was "the tension is good." It's funny how something so basic can be so crucial to hear at times. Personally I struggle with the tension of what I want to call my "career." I desperately want to be one of those people that said in high school, "I'm going to be nurse." So they went to college to study nursing and now they are nurses and most likely will be until they retire. I want to be that person...but I am not. Truth is, I graduated from college almost five years ago and I still cannot say with one hundred percent certainty what I will do with my life. There are some things I know of course, but they never seem sufficient when I am trying to explain my life's goals to another person.

People assume that my plan is to open a coffeehouse. This is not a bad assumption by any means, and honestly it may very well happen some day. I love coffee and I have a passion for using that medium to reach the community, to foster relationships and better the lives of those involved in the entire coffee process (ie. Fair Trade beans). But when I look at my life, I am not sure that that is the end of the story.

I am equally as passionate about the church as I am about coffee. I love seeing the church come together and work toward a common goal. I believe that the church does not need to be irrelevant in today's culture but I also believe that some significant changes must occur so that the church remains authentic and a vital part of the community. I almost studied Industrial and Organizational Psychology or Sociology in grad school so that I could work towards being a consultant of sorts for churches to help them reach out to the community. (I ended up studying something else but that's a long story.) I feel that the church often ignores these sciences and therefore knows nothing about the people they are trying to help. My thought was that I could utilize the very same tools that the business world seems to have conquered but use them as a way to genuinely help people. Instead of understanding people so that we could sell them a product, we could use that understanding to connect and really impact a church's community. It would also be used as a way to unify those working together inside a church so that a church staff could use tools like personality profiles to help understand one another and relate better...in the hopes that this could avoid the ugly conflicts that all too often tear apart churches.

The truth is I still want to do both of these things. I currently work in a coffeehouse that gives all profits back to the community and missions projects around the world. And I love it. But ultimately my heart still has a soft spot for the church and for making the church reflect the church of the New Testament.

Honestly, this dichotomy can get rather frustrating to someone like me. I'm a thinker but sometimes thinking doesn't solve the problem. Perhaps though, I am not meant to solve this "problem." Beth Moore said something at Catalyst that really resonated with me. She said to make sure we do not commit to a particular ministry field but just to commit to God and the rest will take care of itself. I needed to hear that. So that's my plan for the next year...to commit to God and learn as a much as I can about as many things as I can. I don't know where that will leave me in a year but today I'm going to try and take the advice of Jesus and just worry about today and let tomorrow worry about itself.

Catalyst 2010

Last week the entire NCC staff packed up and flew to Georgia for the Catalyst Conference. It was incredible. The entire time was constant stimulation and honestly a bit hard to digest while we there. I am the type of person that needs a few minutes alone in quiet to process tough new information but that is not the dynamic of Catalyst. In the "down time" there were knives being thrown and a man shooting out of a cannon...not exactly relaxing reflecting time.

So in this past week since I've been home I've been trying to take time to review my notes and internalize the great things I heard. It's funny because I think some of the things that hit me most were the things that speakers said as a side note or off the cuff, not the actual topic of their discussions.

I also had a moment that as I sat there I realized that I get to be apart of something amazing. Obviously I have repeatedly had that thought since being in DC, but something about being in an arena full of people that are there for a common goal, does something for my soul. My heart longs for unity and for people that are willing to set aside differences to really reach the world. One moment that will stick in my mind for quite awhile is when Gungor was on stage. It was the end of the song Beautiful Things (which has been a favorite of mine for awhile now), when they just entered into this beautiful instrumental form of worship. I took a second to look around the arena and watch as all these people poured their hearts out to God. It was truly beautiful and I think it completely embodied the spirit of the song. We are all so flawed but God has taken us and turned us into something beautiful...a reflection of Him. I think I will be wrestling with some of the things I heard last week for awhile and I'm sure I will blog more about that, but I am hoping that feeling of unity is one that sticks.

Leadership

As proteges, we have been reading Next Generation Leader by Andy Stanley. The entire book is filled with some really great insights and practical applications. Today we discussed the book as a group and it was really insightful.

I found that my biggest obstacle when reading the book was identifying with label of "leader." It honestly does not make much sense that I have as much trouble with that title as I do. I am consistently put into leadership roles and I really want to be a person of influence. I think my biggest problem is knowing how uncertain I am all the time. How things scare me and I feel so lost and helpless so much of the time. Or how I may have made a good decision here or there, but for every good decision were just as many bad decisions or a very real chance of me choosing incorrectly. One thing Andy mentioned in the book was that he is never more than 80% certain of things. I found that refreshing. Maybe I'm not the only one that doesn't have it all figured out? And maybe that's ok?

Earlier today in our staff meeting, a member of our staff lead us in a devotional. He asked us what the major theme our "story" would be. He said that throughout the Bible, God's theme is that of humility. Logically if we are to be reflecting God, then our stories should also be stories of humility. For me, this really tied into everything we have been reading about being a leader.

I want desperately to be a leader of humility but I fear that more often I am a leader of insecurity. By that I mean this...I am perfectly fine being behind the scenes and not the face in front of the crowd. This may appear as humility to some but really it is often my insecurity. I am fine receiving praise but I am often not fine with receiving criticism. If I can stay in the background, my mistakes are not as noticeable. This is not easy for me to admit and in some ways I really do enjoy doing the behind the scenes stuff. But we also have been examining our motives, and if I perfectly honest, my motives are not always pure.

One of the goals I have set for this next year is that I will step out and try more new things. I will say yes, even when I am afraid. I will most likely not get it right every time and I may even fall back into old habits but I am praying that God will help to give me strength to have truly humble motives. I have a feeling I have found a few people that might help to keep me accountable to this as well.

Practical is Impractical.

So I have been in DC for a whole week now! It has been ca-razy!! It's really weird because I feel like I've been here forever (except of course when I'm driving or trying to figure where in the world I am!) But I feel like it just clicks.

I was sitting at dinner the other night with some new friends from the church and I suddenly became very aware that I had only met these people a couple of days before but it felt like so much longer. I keep having these little moments where it really sinks in that I now LIVE in DC and this isn't just another visit. I was able to unpack the last of my stuff and go grocery shopping last night. I felt like a real resident. I keep waiting for the moment when I freak out about this but it hasn't happened yet. So far I am just grateful to God that I get to do this. I've been reflecting on the last few years and I can now see how they have prepared me for exactly this moment and for that...I am also grateful.

Yesterday we got to sit down and hang out with Pastor Mark (Batterson) for awhile. Up until now we have only really gotten to see him in passing so it was nice to just get to know him for a bit. We all told our stories and how we ended up here and he pointed out that when I told mine I used the word "practical" a lot. That's because I desperately want to be "practical" but so far my life has not reflected that. It seems that God keeps calling me to do impractical things like pack up and move to DC. He smiled and said "practical is impractical anyway."

I think I'm going to like it here.

NCC Day number 3!

Well today was my third day as part of the National Community Church Protege Program. Honestly, these last few days have been a whirl wind and I cannot believe that I have only been here since Wednesday. It feels like much longer than that...but in a good way. I cannot believe that this simple girl from Western New York gets to be a part of something so amazing. These last couple of days I have met a-mazing people and am really excited to see what's in store for all of us this next year.

I moved on Wednesday and started at 9am on Thursday. We got to spend some time getting to know the other five people in the program. We got to share our crazy stories of how God had brought each one of us to this place. It was interesting because we all have such different backgrounds and passions but we all seem to share common threads in our stories and there is an ease to our conversations. I'm looking forward to learning from each of them.

The NCC staff...well I actually am having trouble articulating how fantastic everyone has been. Their energy is off the charts and they really couldn't be more welcoming. I was asked at dinner tonight what my favorite part has been so far. I immediately thought of some of the crazy things I've seen and participated in these last couple of days. There has been cheering, high fives, the "slow clap" that evolves into enormous roars, karaoke and even some dancing. These are things that most of you will know, I usually do not enjoy. And if I ever do enjoy them, it is after I have known the other participants for a lengthy period of time, not after mere hours of meeting. But truly...I have loved every minute, even as I awkwardly sang my part of the duet to Jesus Freak, I loved it. This is because I do not feel that I am surrounded by strangers but by lifelong friends. Friends that share my vision and passion for God. I mean really...what more could you ask for?

As for DC itself...I've fallen completely in love with the city. I know there is crime and traffic and sirens and yelling, and I love every bit of it. The history and the culture and the richness of tradition is just beautiful.

There just is no other place like this, and I intend to soak of every experience I can while I am here. So far I have had something scheduled almost every minute but today I did get to experience something new....I road the bus for the first time, and then road it alone for the first time. I felt like a such a big girl! Haha! Anyway...I know that there will be some trying times this year and it won't all be as wonderful as these first few days but I know that God is doing something amazing and for some reason I get to be a part of it. For that I am so thankful and SO excited for this next year.

Dear Friends...

August 7, 2010

Dear Friends and Family,

I hope this letter finds you well! This summer has been a whirlwind for me with so many great things that I cannot even believe how God has been blessing me! In just a few weeks, I have some major changes that will be greatly impacting my life. I’m so excited, but let me explain from the beginning before I get ahead of myself.

In the past I have found it hard to explain to others what it is that I actually plan to do with this life God has given me. Honestly, that is because God has been slowly revealing His plan to me as well. Over the last few years I have worked for a few different coffee shops and during this time I have fallen in love with coffee (but you probably know that!) My love of coffee extends past the caffeine fix in the morning. While working in coffeehouses I have been able to observe first hand how coffee can host conversations with old friends, first dates, Bible studies or business arrangements. I have witnessed how a steaming mug of coffee cupped in someone’s hands can put a person at ease and foster deep conversations. There is also an artistry that emerges in coffeehouses that highlights creativity and encourages innovation. This love extends past the coffeehouse as well. I have learned how the coffee trade affects more than my latte and myself, but when it is Fair Trade, can change the lives of the farmers and their employees. I obviously could go on about this topic but I should probably move on before I bore you to death!

As a student at Southeastern University, I studied psychology and developed a passion for people. After I graduated I knew that I must use my life to serve others. My heart broke for the hurting and I knew that I must do something to help. During my time living in Columbus, I attended Continuum Church and got really involved in the Outreach Group. This gave me a way to show God’s love to others and serve the community. I learned that there was a place for the church in the marketplace and as Christians we should utilize these opportunities.

This brings me to where I am today. In a couple of weeks I will be graduating with my masters degree in human services concentrating on business. This degree is the perfect marriage of my two passions. Upon graduation I also have some exciting news…

For the last couple of years I have been following the ministry of Mark Batterson at National Community Church in Washington, DC. NCC owns a coffeehouse on Capitol Hill where they use the proceeds to benefit the community. They have an intense belief that because Jesus spent his time with people at the well, today’s church should do the same. They (and I) believe that a coffeehouse is a modern day well and the perfect place for the community and church to intersect. NCC also has a yearlong internship program they call their Protégé Program. I am so excited to say that I have been accepted into this program!

I cannot think of anything else I would rather do for this next year. My position will be split between working in the church’s coffeehouse, Ebenezers and with the event planner, planning community events to be hosted by Ebenezers. This position perfectly matches my schooling, past experiences, passions and future goals.

The Protégé internship program at National Community Church is a non-paid internship (though I will be paid for my part-time position at Ebenezers). DC is an expensive city and I know this seems like a crazy idea to pursue in times like these. But I also know the God we serve, and I know the doors he has opened thus far, and that He will continue to provide! With this in mind, I write asking you to support me spiritually with your prayers, and also financially. Each one of you understands my passion for ministry and know the importance of this type of opportunity.

Would you please consider supporting me financially this year, or perhaps with a one time gift? Please, please continue praying for God’s wisdom and guidance. While I am definitely a city girl, DC is a whole new world. I am so excited but almost equally as nervous. Thank God for His peace, right? It is going to be a crazy, new adventure, and I am grateful that you are along for the ride! And if you are interested, please follow my experience in DC on my blog!

With love,

Heather

Here is the best address to reach me:

135 W. Summit St.

Lakewood, NY 14750

hmcorsi@gmail.com

http://randomthoughtshmc.blogspot.com

Update...

So I realized that I actually haven't written anything on this blog in quite awhile. I actually have a lot of exciting stuff happening, perhaps that is why I haven't had time to write!

First, I will say that I am officially under two weeks left of school...thirteen days to be exact! I'm so ready to be done with school. It's a little weird because I am pretty sure that this will be the last time I will officially be a "student." Honestly, it feels sort-of great but it is also the end of a really big part of my life. I'm ready now though, ready to start a new phase of life and take the things I've learn and start to apply them. With the combination of schooling and experience I have, I feel that I am really ready to start my career now. Unfortunately, my career path is still probably not going to look like everyone else's.

This path will begin with a move to Washington, DC next month. This is where I will begin a position at National Community Church where I will work for their coffeehouse and in event planning. I actually don't think I could be more excited about this. I cannot think of anything else I would rather do for the next year. There will be some obstacles, mainly financial obstacles, but I am trusting that God will provide. I honestly am not sure how this will all work out but I really feel that this is where God has called me, so I have faith that He will provide for me.

I do have a lot of work during this next month but I am so ready to get started. I will try to keep this updated as I move forward in this next journey!