Friends

I've been meaning to write this blog post for a couple of weeks now but I'm just now getting around to it. Anyway, I heard something someone said one day, sort-of in passing, that has the potential to change lives. We had a musician perform at Ebenezers a few weeks ago, Justin McRoberts. Between songs he told some stories. It was in the midst of one of these stories, when he said something that shook me to the core. He said that being a musician he travels a lot and constantly is meeting new friends. Then, almost as a side note he added that he has come to realize that there are no strangers, only friends, some you know well and some you haven't met yet. He said he views everyone as a friend until they prove otherwise, rather that vice versa.

Go ahead...read that again. Now think about it.

If you adopted that mentality how would that change your interactions with others? How would change how you viewed others? Don't we give our friends a pass when they are grumpy and assume there is a reason for their mood? If our friends ask of for something don't we try to give them what they need? Don't we forgive their quirks or neurotic tendencies? Instead of viewing the guy that just cut you off as a jerk, don't we just laugh it off if it's our friend? Don't we confront our friends when they need to be confronted and protect when they need to be protected?

For the last couple of weeks, I've been pondering this concept. I truly think that having this slight shift in mentality could be life altering. Truth is, it's really hard to do, but I'm praying that I can make it second nature. I want to stop seeing strangers and begin to see friends, old and new.

Planning Retreat 2010

Today is our first day back to work after two days away at our Planning Retreat. I'm sure I am not alone in my feeling a tad bit overwhelmed. We came up with some great stuff the last couple of days...but now we need to find the time to actually implement these things!

The retreat consists of the entire NCC staff driving up to Baltimore and spending two days dreaming and planning for the next year. Each person's time is split between personal planning time and group planning time.

When I first heard about this...I had no idea what in the world I would be able to contribute. I tend to be more creative when I am provided with some sort-of framework, so at first this entire idea was incredibly intimidating. It turned out to be wonderful however, and my department mentors were able to provide me with just enough framework to really help me envision some pretty cool things for the future. It turned out to be a great couple of days.

I am thankful to be a part of a church that is willing to be such an emphasis on planning. And not only planning...be reevaluating. Each department looked at what they were currently doing and evaluated what was working and if it wasn't...they were willing to eliminate it. That principle is such a part of the NCC core and is something that drew me to them. The idea that just because it has become tradition or we are comfortable with it, does not mean that we need to continue it, or that it is the best way to do things. I think that takes incredible bravery to nix something that may just not be as good as it could be. I love that.

I heard about some really amazing projects and ideas this weekend. I am so excited to see these things come to fruition. It's inspiring to watch the process of God breathing new, beautiful ideas into us and helping us to move forward with those promises. I am blessed to have a job that I honestly cannot wait to get started on my new projects and watch as others begin theirs as well.

Good for the Soul Friends

This weekend I got to spend time with some friends from college. It was a blast. They are the people in my life that we can literally not contact one another for months but as soon as we do its like we've hung out everyday since the days of Southeastern.

One of the best parts of having friends like that is seeing the evolution that takes place in a person in the years immediately following college. The main reason we decided to get together (besides the fact that it had been far too long) was that our one friend had a baby. A beautiful beautiful baby.

Stuff like that made me reflect on the past and remember the first time she had even ever mentioned this guy, who would become the father of her child. I remember it clearly; we were walking to class and she casually mentioned she had gotten a letter from Bruce. Our other friend and I of course made her back up and explain who this "Bruce" character was, why he was writing her letters and why we had never heard of him before. It's funny to remember that so vividly and then to be sitting in their living room cooing over their new baby.

With both of these dear friends I have watched as their college romances have blossomed into beautiful marriages. I've watched as they have matured and seen subtle changes that have helped them become one with their spouses. As a single girl myself, I am thankful that I have such great examples of marriage in my closest friends. They are inspiring. And as we move to the next phase and I watch as they step into the roles of motherhood, I can only be proud.

These are the kinds of friends that are good for the soul. I wish we could get together every week but we all seem to be drawn to different corners of this country. So for now, I will just cherish the opportunities we get to spend time with one another.

I truly believe that their friendship was a gift from God to me. On the surface the three of us are very different but we seem to relate at a much deeper level than most of my other friendships. I believe the Bible calls it "iron sharpening iron." If you have those friends and you haven't called them in awhile...call them, schedule a visit. And when you get together, laugh and encourage one another. Seriously. Go call them. It will be good for your soul too.

Goals

I've recently been talking a lot about goals with people. This consists mostly of the other person listing some of their goals and me internally panicking while preparing for the inevitable question. What are some of your goals?

It's not that I don't have goals. I do. They just look a little different sometimes. For example, I cannot bring myself to set a goal to have my mortgage paid off by the time I am 55 when I do not yet even have a mortgage. It's just not how I am wired. My goals are often more theoretical in nature...more like themes. This does not usually fulfill the other person's expectations of a proper goal however; this has proven to be the source of frustration for both of us.

I desperately have tried to be that person that says I'm going to school for blank so that I can become blank and do blank and blank. (Upon rereading that last sentence I realize that it doesn't sound as innocent as I meant it but I think you get the picture.) The honest truth is however, I'm secretly glad I'm not one of those people. I had romanticized the the notion in the past but what could be more exciting than not knowing the future? So far, it's actually worked out pretty well and it's taking me some crazy places that I would not have planned for. I also would not have added them to a goal list, because I probably wouldn't have thought of things like "graduate from Southeastern University," "move to Columbus," or even "move to DC and work for a church on Capitol Hill." And even though it wasn't formally on my "goal" sheet it seems to have happened anyway.

I used to think that if I ever married that it had better be to a man that had a distinct pattern for life so that one of us would possess some direction. Now, I actually think the opposite might be a better fit. My life has been pretty crazy and I can only imagine that it will keep being so, so I might as well try to find someone willing to join me in this crazy ride rather than stabilize it. And besides, I do have direction, its just more of a turn by turn type of direction rather than the entire zoomed out Google map.

I don't think goals or resolutions are bad, I just feel that mine may not look like everyone else's. And that...that is okay.

Catalyst thoughts...

As a mentioned before, the theme of Catalyst was "the tension is good." It's funny how something so basic can be so crucial to hear at times. Personally I struggle with the tension of what I want to call my "career." I desperately want to be one of those people that said in high school, "I'm going to be nurse." So they went to college to study nursing and now they are nurses and most likely will be until they retire. I want to be that person...but I am not. Truth is, I graduated from college almost five years ago and I still cannot say with one hundred percent certainty what I will do with my life. There are some things I know of course, but they never seem sufficient when I am trying to explain my life's goals to another person.

People assume that my plan is to open a coffeehouse. This is not a bad assumption by any means, and honestly it may very well happen some day. I love coffee and I have a passion for using that medium to reach the community, to foster relationships and better the lives of those involved in the entire coffee process (ie. Fair Trade beans). But when I look at my life, I am not sure that that is the end of the story.

I am equally as passionate about the church as I am about coffee. I love seeing the church come together and work toward a common goal. I believe that the church does not need to be irrelevant in today's culture but I also believe that some significant changes must occur so that the church remains authentic and a vital part of the community. I almost studied Industrial and Organizational Psychology or Sociology in grad school so that I could work towards being a consultant of sorts for churches to help them reach out to the community. (I ended up studying something else but that's a long story.) I feel that the church often ignores these sciences and therefore knows nothing about the people they are trying to help. My thought was that I could utilize the very same tools that the business world seems to have conquered but use them as a way to genuinely help people. Instead of understanding people so that we could sell them a product, we could use that understanding to connect and really impact a church's community. It would also be used as a way to unify those working together inside a church so that a church staff could use tools like personality profiles to help understand one another and relate better...in the hopes that this could avoid the ugly conflicts that all too often tear apart churches.

The truth is I still want to do both of these things. I currently work in a coffeehouse that gives all profits back to the community and missions projects around the world. And I love it. But ultimately my heart still has a soft spot for the church and for making the church reflect the church of the New Testament.

Honestly, this dichotomy can get rather frustrating to someone like me. I'm a thinker but sometimes thinking doesn't solve the problem. Perhaps though, I am not meant to solve this "problem." Beth Moore said something at Catalyst that really resonated with me. She said to make sure we do not commit to a particular ministry field but just to commit to God and the rest will take care of itself. I needed to hear that. So that's my plan for the next year...to commit to God and learn as a much as I can about as many things as I can. I don't know where that will leave me in a year but today I'm going to try and take the advice of Jesus and just worry about today and let tomorrow worry about itself.

Catalyst 2010

Last week the entire NCC staff packed up and flew to Georgia for the Catalyst Conference. It was incredible. The entire time was constant stimulation and honestly a bit hard to digest while we there. I am the type of person that needs a few minutes alone in quiet to process tough new information but that is not the dynamic of Catalyst. In the "down time" there were knives being thrown and a man shooting out of a cannon...not exactly relaxing reflecting time.

So in this past week since I've been home I've been trying to take time to review my notes and internalize the great things I heard. It's funny because I think some of the things that hit me most were the things that speakers said as a side note or off the cuff, not the actual topic of their discussions.

I also had a moment that as I sat there I realized that I get to be apart of something amazing. Obviously I have repeatedly had that thought since being in DC, but something about being in an arena full of people that are there for a common goal, does something for my soul. My heart longs for unity and for people that are willing to set aside differences to really reach the world. One moment that will stick in my mind for quite awhile is when Gungor was on stage. It was the end of the song Beautiful Things (which has been a favorite of mine for awhile now), when they just entered into this beautiful instrumental form of worship. I took a second to look around the arena and watch as all these people poured their hearts out to God. It was truly beautiful and I think it completely embodied the spirit of the song. We are all so flawed but God has taken us and turned us into something beautiful...a reflection of Him. I think I will be wrestling with some of the things I heard last week for awhile and I'm sure I will blog more about that, but I am hoping that feeling of unity is one that sticks.

Leadership

As proteges, we have been reading Next Generation Leader by Andy Stanley. The entire book is filled with some really great insights and practical applications. Today we discussed the book as a group and it was really insightful.

I found that my biggest obstacle when reading the book was identifying with label of "leader." It honestly does not make much sense that I have as much trouble with that title as I do. I am consistently put into leadership roles and I really want to be a person of influence. I think my biggest problem is knowing how uncertain I am all the time. How things scare me and I feel so lost and helpless so much of the time. Or how I may have made a good decision here or there, but for every good decision were just as many bad decisions or a very real chance of me choosing incorrectly. One thing Andy mentioned in the book was that he is never more than 80% certain of things. I found that refreshing. Maybe I'm not the only one that doesn't have it all figured out? And maybe that's ok?

Earlier today in our staff meeting, a member of our staff lead us in a devotional. He asked us what the major theme our "story" would be. He said that throughout the Bible, God's theme is that of humility. Logically if we are to be reflecting God, then our stories should also be stories of humility. For me, this really tied into everything we have been reading about being a leader.

I want desperately to be a leader of humility but I fear that more often I am a leader of insecurity. By that I mean this...I am perfectly fine being behind the scenes and not the face in front of the crowd. This may appear as humility to some but really it is often my insecurity. I am fine receiving praise but I am often not fine with receiving criticism. If I can stay in the background, my mistakes are not as noticeable. This is not easy for me to admit and in some ways I really do enjoy doing the behind the scenes stuff. But we also have been examining our motives, and if I perfectly honest, my motives are not always pure.

One of the goals I have set for this next year is that I will step out and try more new things. I will say yes, even when I am afraid. I will most likely not get it right every time and I may even fall back into old habits but I am praying that God will help to give me strength to have truly humble motives. I have a feeling I have found a few people that might help to keep me accountable to this as well.

Practical is Impractical.

So I have been in DC for a whole week now! It has been ca-razy!! It's really weird because I feel like I've been here forever (except of course when I'm driving or trying to figure where in the world I am!) But I feel like it just clicks.

I was sitting at dinner the other night with some new friends from the church and I suddenly became very aware that I had only met these people a couple of days before but it felt like so much longer. I keep having these little moments where it really sinks in that I now LIVE in DC and this isn't just another visit. I was able to unpack the last of my stuff and go grocery shopping last night. I felt like a real resident. I keep waiting for the moment when I freak out about this but it hasn't happened yet. So far I am just grateful to God that I get to do this. I've been reflecting on the last few years and I can now see how they have prepared me for exactly this moment and for that...I am also grateful.

Yesterday we got to sit down and hang out with Pastor Mark (Batterson) for awhile. Up until now we have only really gotten to see him in passing so it was nice to just get to know him for a bit. We all told our stories and how we ended up here and he pointed out that when I told mine I used the word "practical" a lot. That's because I desperately want to be "practical" but so far my life has not reflected that. It seems that God keeps calling me to do impractical things like pack up and move to DC. He smiled and said "practical is impractical anyway."

I think I'm going to like it here.

NCC Day number 3!

Well today was my third day as part of the National Community Church Protege Program. Honestly, these last few days have been a whirl wind and I cannot believe that I have only been here since Wednesday. It feels like much longer than that...but in a good way. I cannot believe that this simple girl from Western New York gets to be a part of something so amazing. These last couple of days I have met a-mazing people and am really excited to see what's in store for all of us this next year.

I moved on Wednesday and started at 9am on Thursday. We got to spend some time getting to know the other five people in the program. We got to share our crazy stories of how God had brought each one of us to this place. It was interesting because we all have such different backgrounds and passions but we all seem to share common threads in our stories and there is an ease to our conversations. I'm looking forward to learning from each of them.

The NCC staff...well I actually am having trouble articulating how fantastic everyone has been. Their energy is off the charts and they really couldn't be more welcoming. I was asked at dinner tonight what my favorite part has been so far. I immediately thought of some of the crazy things I've seen and participated in these last couple of days. There has been cheering, high fives, the "slow clap" that evolves into enormous roars, karaoke and even some dancing. These are things that most of you will know, I usually do not enjoy. And if I ever do enjoy them, it is after I have known the other participants for a lengthy period of time, not after mere hours of meeting. But truly...I have loved every minute, even as I awkwardly sang my part of the duet to Jesus Freak, I loved it. This is because I do not feel that I am surrounded by strangers but by lifelong friends. Friends that share my vision and passion for God. I mean really...what more could you ask for?

As for DC itself...I've fallen completely in love with the city. I know there is crime and traffic and sirens and yelling, and I love every bit of it. The history and the culture and the richness of tradition is just beautiful.

There just is no other place like this, and I intend to soak of every experience I can while I am here. So far I have had something scheduled almost every minute but today I did get to experience something new....I road the bus for the first time, and then road it alone for the first time. I felt like a such a big girl! Haha! Anyway...I know that there will be some trying times this year and it won't all be as wonderful as these first few days but I know that God is doing something amazing and for some reason I get to be a part of it. For that I am so thankful and SO excited for this next year.

Dear Friends...

August 7, 2010

Dear Friends and Family,

I hope this letter finds you well! This summer has been a whirlwind for me with so many great things that I cannot even believe how God has been blessing me! In just a few weeks, I have some major changes that will be greatly impacting my life. I’m so excited, but let me explain from the beginning before I get ahead of myself.

In the past I have found it hard to explain to others what it is that I actually plan to do with this life God has given me. Honestly, that is because God has been slowly revealing His plan to me as well. Over the last few years I have worked for a few different coffee shops and during this time I have fallen in love with coffee (but you probably know that!) My love of coffee extends past the caffeine fix in the morning. While working in coffeehouses I have been able to observe first hand how coffee can host conversations with old friends, first dates, Bible studies or business arrangements. I have witnessed how a steaming mug of coffee cupped in someone’s hands can put a person at ease and foster deep conversations. There is also an artistry that emerges in coffeehouses that highlights creativity and encourages innovation. This love extends past the coffeehouse as well. I have learned how the coffee trade affects more than my latte and myself, but when it is Fair Trade, can change the lives of the farmers and their employees. I obviously could go on about this topic but I should probably move on before I bore you to death!

As a student at Southeastern University, I studied psychology and developed a passion for people. After I graduated I knew that I must use my life to serve others. My heart broke for the hurting and I knew that I must do something to help. During my time living in Columbus, I attended Continuum Church and got really involved in the Outreach Group. This gave me a way to show God’s love to others and serve the community. I learned that there was a place for the church in the marketplace and as Christians we should utilize these opportunities.

This brings me to where I am today. In a couple of weeks I will be graduating with my masters degree in human services concentrating on business. This degree is the perfect marriage of my two passions. Upon graduation I also have some exciting news…

For the last couple of years I have been following the ministry of Mark Batterson at National Community Church in Washington, DC. NCC owns a coffeehouse on Capitol Hill where they use the proceeds to benefit the community. They have an intense belief that because Jesus spent his time with people at the well, today’s church should do the same. They (and I) believe that a coffeehouse is a modern day well and the perfect place for the community and church to intersect. NCC also has a yearlong internship program they call their Protégé Program. I am so excited to say that I have been accepted into this program!

I cannot think of anything else I would rather do for this next year. My position will be split between working in the church’s coffeehouse, Ebenezers and with the event planner, planning community events to be hosted by Ebenezers. This position perfectly matches my schooling, past experiences, passions and future goals.

The Protégé internship program at National Community Church is a non-paid internship (though I will be paid for my part-time position at Ebenezers). DC is an expensive city and I know this seems like a crazy idea to pursue in times like these. But I also know the God we serve, and I know the doors he has opened thus far, and that He will continue to provide! With this in mind, I write asking you to support me spiritually with your prayers, and also financially. Each one of you understands my passion for ministry and know the importance of this type of opportunity.

Would you please consider supporting me financially this year, or perhaps with a one time gift? Please, please continue praying for God’s wisdom and guidance. While I am definitely a city girl, DC is a whole new world. I am so excited but almost equally as nervous. Thank God for His peace, right? It is going to be a crazy, new adventure, and I am grateful that you are along for the ride! And if you are interested, please follow my experience in DC on my blog!

With love,

Heather

Here is the best address to reach me:

135 W. Summit St.

Lakewood, NY 14750

hmcorsi@gmail.com

http://randomthoughtshmc.blogspot.com

Update...

So I realized that I actually haven't written anything on this blog in quite awhile. I actually have a lot of exciting stuff happening, perhaps that is why I haven't had time to write!

First, I will say that I am officially under two weeks left of school...thirteen days to be exact! I'm so ready to be done with school. It's a little weird because I am pretty sure that this will be the last time I will officially be a "student." Honestly, it feels sort-of great but it is also the end of a really big part of my life. I'm ready now though, ready to start a new phase of life and take the things I've learn and start to apply them. With the combination of schooling and experience I have, I feel that I am really ready to start my career now. Unfortunately, my career path is still probably not going to look like everyone else's.

This path will begin with a move to Washington, DC next month. This is where I will begin a position at National Community Church where I will work for their coffeehouse and in event planning. I actually don't think I could be more excited about this. I cannot think of anything else I would rather do for the next year. There will be some obstacles, mainly financial obstacles, but I am trusting that God will provide. I honestly am not sure how this will all work out but I really feel that this is where God has called me, so I have faith that He will provide for me.

I do have a lot of work during this next month but I am so ready to get started. I will try to keep this updated as I move forward in this next journey!

Etsy

Here is a link to some of the beautiful jewelry my sister makes. (Some of mine might sneak in there too!)

Be sure to keep stopping back, she's adding more daily!

A Decade

Today is ten years exactly since I graduated from high school. Yesterday marked ten years of being a legal adult. At first, the thought of my ten year reunion sounds ludicrous, but then...I began to reflect on this past decade. There are certain times when it is hard not to reflect on life, where it has gone, and where it is going...New Year's, birthdays, and ten year reunions.

Ten years ago I was a lost, uncomfortable girl working at Burger King just trying to figure out what was next after high school. Since then, I have lived in five different states, had three different cars, worked over a dozen jobs, lost and gained relatives, and made great and not so great friends. I have laughed until I cried and cried until I laughed. I have been a barista in Florida, insurance rep in Ohio, meat market employee in West Virginia, and supportive living specialist for the developmentally disabled in New York...and so much more. When I look at these facts it feels like a lifetime...and it gets me excited.

The thing about reflecting on the past is...it leads to thinking about the future. I am so ready for the next decade. I am ready for my next adventures. I already know that my next ten years will begin with me obtaining my masters degree, moving to Washington DC and beginning to immerse myself in the ministry I know I am called to, all within the first six months. How could a decade that follows that be bad? I know it will not always be easy or fun, but it will be full of truth and God. With these things, I am ready for whatever is next. I finally feel like I'm at a place that I am content in a way that is deeper than before. Perhaps it could be describes as a peace that passes all understanding...

YEA!!!

Well...I got it!!! I got the position with the Protege Program at National Community Church in Washington DC. I honestly got a little teary when I read the email. I cannot remember wanting anything this bad before.

My position will be split between Ebenezers coffeehouse management and event planning. It actually could not be more perfect for me. I feel that I can learn so much from this role, at the same time I feel like I actually have something to give back as well. It begins in September and lasts an entire year. I now need to find a place to live but I am trusting that since God has allowed me to be accepted into this position He will help with the rest. Now I just want to hurry up and finish school and get this summer over! (I never thought I would wish the summer that has barely started would end, but I sure do!)

Now...to get some sleep, though I feel like a kid on Christmas Eve...I can't even imagine what it will be like when I get even closer!

Here is a link to better explain what I will be doing.

Interview!!

I got an email today asking if I am available tomorrow for a phone interview for the Protege Program. I was like,"Ummm...yes!!!" I'm so excited, though I am trying to understand that it is only an interview and not an offer for the position. I cannot help but daydream about this however. It turns out I have a two and a half hour break in the middle of my day tomorrow and I didn't know what I was going to do during that time. So it actually worked out perfectly. I'm just praying that I can remain focused and be articulate for the interview. I'd be furious if I blew it because I got too nervous or excited. It's for the Protege that works directly with Ebenezers, the church run coffeehouse on Capital Hill. I don't think it could be much more perfect than that. So that's the update on that for now :)

New Job

So I just started a new job...a new job that is totally out of my comfort zone. I am finally doing something that pertains to my degree but it is so different to really be out there rather than just studying about it. I think I will enjoy it for awhile, but certainly not forever. There is a lot of bureaucratic mumbo jumbo but I think that the interactions with clients will be rewarding.

I am working with the mentally disabled and helping to support them as they learn everyday skills such as independent bathing or making purchases independently. I am on week three of training and its quite exhausting learning so much new stuff continually. I am ready for a vacation already!

I am still praying that I get this internship in DC. I was told that they would be making selections at the end of May. I had not heard anything either way and was of course going out of my mind. I don't think it was possible to check my phone more often than I was. Lately I have even been getting ideas and a vision for what I'd like my role to be in this church...and it has really made me really excited. So I broke down and emailed them today to ask if they had made their selections yet or if they were still reviewing applications. I quickly got a reply that they were still reviewing applications and she said I would hopefully be hearing something in the next couple of weeks, complete with a smiley face. This means I might just find out on my birthday. Wouldn't that be a great present?! I honestly don't understand why I would have the desire and vision I have had recently if I wasn't supposed to be apart of this. I just would not make sense to me, unless I am supposed to be apart of this in a different way. I don't know, I just know that this is the one birthday present I am really praying for!

In a nutshell...

Well this week has been interesting. I've started a new job so I am in training mode right now. Honestly...I'm not sure about this job yet. It has many pros and cons and well...I'm just not sure. I am hoping it is only for the summer but you never can tell. Anyway, it feels like I haven't had a moment to breathe this week. I hate being stressed but I've had a few things on my mind lately that are not helping the mission to remain stress free this summer. But that is life I suppose. Well anyway yesterday my week seemed to culminate in one moment...one moment that said all.

I should back up a little. A couple very close friends of mine are currently pregnant. I'm so excited for them. Today was one such friend's baby shower. So yesterday I was at Walmart picking up a card and one last baby item to throw in the bag of baby goodies. When I reached the register, the cashier asked me if I had a little one. I said no and he said, "Oh you're going to a shower?" "Yup, my good friend is having a baby," I said. "Does that make you feel like you should be having a baby?" he asked. "No, I've got some time yet," already I had a feeling that I really just wanted to stop this conversation but instead he went on. "Yeah, well lots of my friends are getting married and having babies and I feel like I should. Then I just think, man I am no where near getting married or having kids. But I guess I still have some time too, I'm only 21. And you don't look like you're anywhere near 30 so you've probably got time too." Then I punched him in the face.

OK, maybe I didn't really punch him but instead said, "yes, I still have some time," and took my bags and left. Apparently when you are a 21 year old male, you think women hit menopause at 30. So yes, that is my week in a nutshell...thankfully a new week starts tomorrow. I pray this new week will be better...and that I can avoid his line at Walmart in the future.

Ring Ring...

Lately I have noticed something about phones. A ringing phone often evokes some sort of emotion from me. When its an old friend's name that flashes across the screen...happiness. When its a bill collector...dread. When its a prospective new employer...nervousness.

Well lately I am waiting for a phone call. One that (not to be too dramatic) could realistically change my life. The silence of my phone is driving me crazy. Seriously...at this point I just need it to ring. Phones are strange things aren't they? They can bring simple chit chat or life changing news.

I sure am thankful for phones though...there is no way I would have survived waiting for the pony express.

Easter Candy

I have an amazing ability to save Easter (or Halloween) candy. I was always the kid that was still digging out chocolate eggs well into the summer. My sister was the opposite. Her basket was mostly devoured before we left for school on Monday. I had always thought my particular method of saving candy was far superior to hers. When I had a craving months later, I could simply consult my secret stash. I saved as if I believed I would desperately need a bite of chocolate and there would be none left on Earth but the few chocolate eggs in my desk drawer. (Not that that is where my stash is, so don't go checking my desk next time you need a sweet fix.)

I am a "save the best for last" person. I eat a sandwich outside in so that my last bite is the most delicious part. I eat all around a hamburger before eating the middle. In theory this is brilliant. Except when six months later I find a stale piece of candy I was saving and never got to enjoy. Or when I get full before I have finished my sandwich and have only eaten the outside and all I have left is the messy delicious center.

This principle stretches to other areas of my life as well. I have a tendency to wait. To wait too long. I want to wait until the best possible moment for everything. This is good sometimes but other times I have waited so long that all I have to show for it is a stale peanut butter egg. I'm not sure how to find this balance exactly but I have decided that I'm going to occasionally eat the best bite first. Instead of missing moments, I'm going to start enjoying them as they come. I may still wait sometimes but today...I'm going to eat my chocolate bunny.

First Post!!

This is my first post on my new blog. This will be a new experience for me and hopefully I will keep it up better than my past experimental blogs.

I hope to use this as a space to record my thoughts and feelings and hopefully some of the exciting or even mundane things that happen from day to day. Hopefully some of it will prove to be at least a tiny bit interesting to read!